The Beginner’s Guide to the Keto Diet


“Wait, so butter is good again? And cheese too? But now fruit is bad? What the hell!”

Keto is the hottest trend in health and fitness these days – move over cavemen, sorry Dr. Atkins. There’s a new low carb sheriff in town.

So what’s up with Keto?

You heard from your coworker that his friend’s neighbor’s girlfriend’s dog walker that they “went Keto” and lost crazy weight and feel better than ever.

Which led you to this article, asking: “Steve, Is Keto worthy of the hype? Tell me more!”

Depending on who you talk to, Keto can help you lose weight, fix a litany of health problems, make you smarter, help you build more muscle, grant you the power of levitation, and also do your taxes.

Next year’s taxes.

Of course, you might talk to others who say the diet is brutally restrictive, difficult to comply with long term, and just doesn’t work in today’s modern world.

In fact, U.S. News ranked it 39th out of 39 diets for these very reasons![1]

And thus, you have questions:

  • What are ketones?
  • Can I go half-Keto?
  • Can I strength train on Keto?
  • Can I do the Keto Diet wrong?
  • How do I know I’m in ketosis?
  • Got some sweet-ass Keto recipes for me?

And I got answers.

I also have plenty of corny jokes that will make you both groan and smile.

In exchange, I’ll share cute animal gifs to make sure you’re still paying attention, like this one:

I know what you’re thinking:

“Steve, animal gif bribes? That’s low, even for you. And that carrot will surely knock that adorable bunny right out of ketosis because of its high carb content.

Both accurate statements. But let’s get back on track.

If you want to avoid making incorrect food choices when it comes to going Keto (like Thumper above), you gotta make sure you’re doing things right!

In this Beginner’s Guide to the Keto Diet, I did my darndest to bring together advice and information that will apply to 95% of the population.[2]

I am saying all of this because the Keto Diet is one complex mofo.

It has a ton of rules, can make you feel like crap before it makes you feel amazing (maybe), and it’s tough to stick with unless you have a plan to follow.

Okay, let’s get into KETOOOOOOOO

What is the keto diet or KetoGenic Diet?

The Ketogenic diet, or Keto diet, is a food strategy in which you drastically reduce your carbohydrate intake and replace it with fat in order to get your metabolism to a state called ketosis.

In ketosis, your body converts fat to fuel to burn for energy like Tony Stark burns Captain America for being uptight.

Get it?

Because Captain America is a square. [3]

Don’t worry, the jokes will only get worse from here.

When you’re in ketosis, your body is burning fat for fuel, and this can help create a series of big wins for you in the “get healthy, lose weight, look good naked” department.

In order for ketosis to happen, the body needs to be absent its preferred fuel source: glucose (sugar!).

This can happen in one of TWO ways:

  • Fasting: by not eating at all, your body will burn through your glucose stores and be forced to start converting fat to ketones for fuel.
  • Eating in a “Keto” way: essentially, only fueling your body with fat and avoiding consumption of foods that can be readily converted to sugar.

Where does that sugar usually come from? Generally speaking, carbs. [4]

And boy do we love carbs.

A typical American Diet is more than 50% carbs. And more than 60% of our country is overweight. Is one causing the other? Or are they just correlated?

I’d argue both.

And I’m the nerd writing this.

So, there.

Eat carbs, burn carbs, store sugars, lather, rinse, repeat. Very little fat-burning is taking place – and you’re adding to your body’s sugar storehouse, and that’s what eventually winds up packing the fat onto your body!

This is an overly simplified video explaining the process: